'FICTION'

I am an avid reader. It's been something of a childhood habit for me. To lose yourself in an alternate world, an alternate reality, getting to know people far away from you, some that don't even exist is an experience that has to be experienced to tell how it feels. Their points of view, their opinions. It is the best medium of escapism & just as visual as cinema, if written in the right way.

Of late, I have been developing an interest in this one particular author's books. I found an increasing amount of empathy in the stories. That they were based in real locations added to the empathy. Also, there are no fairy tale characters or fairy tales for that matter in her stories. They are people who you might meet today as you step out of your home, at your workplace, at a cafe, on the street, anywhere. Currently, I am reading a third book by this author and I have to say, this story has got me just as interested as the previous ones. It's also got me thinking & wondering about the parallels between fiction & non-fiction. When I am reading, like say this particular story that I am reading right now for instance, it almost seems to have happened in real life sometime back, real locations, real situations & people too who feel real. There is this amazing one-thing-leads-to-another string of events that is so coherent that I find it increasingly alluring to think that probably the best 'fictional' stories can arise from our very much non-fictional lives. Many people resort to books and cinema as a means of escapism. India can easily boast highly of this, considering a movie like 'Kick', which is as make-belief & superficial as it gets, becomes the top grossing movie of the year. But then if our lives are indeed such amazing sources of stories, why is it that we don't seem to enjoy it as much as we would if it would have been printed in 300 pages? Come on, let us not deny the obvious. We have fancied stepping into a certain someone's shoes & living a life that is in someway, anyway different than our own. Do we at times step aside & see our life, that which has passed & that which is ongoing & simply rejoice in it's nature, regardless of the calamities & catastrophes? Do we find it as fascinating as a 'fictional' story? But is it not? And would packaging your story into say 300-400 pages make you look at your life in a different light?               

I think that is why a book or a movie catches attention & makes us love it to our very core. It's only when the limelight falls on you, your story that you sit up & rejoice in the attention that you get. We all want some amount of attention to be paid. Can you imagine a theater actor reciting the monologue of his life on a grand stage, using every muscle & nerve of his body, with all his life in his voice to an empty hall? You might contend that he probably can, he can just vent out for a catharsis but even in that process, he is imagining a certain someone hearing him & probably smiling or applauding him. I had been maintaining a diary for 5 years until the last two years. Five extremely eventful years of my life have been captured in their true essence in it & apart from the one super embarrassing time that my mother got hold of it & read a few pages, it's privacy has remained sacrosanct. Initially, that's how I wanted it to be, just a reservoir of my feelings & emotions that no one should know about. But now I can't help but think that I indeed wish the concerned people read it, that they were indeed things I wanted to say but I couldn't & so I had this wonderful thought that someone would find this diary innocently, in my absence & just know what I feel, what I want, come up to me & understand & just do what I want. Even today, a remnant of this fantasy stays. Probably after I pass away someone could find it! We want our secrets to not be so sometimes!

Well, whether that would happen or not is completely unknown to me. What I do know & understand is that my life is just as promising & thrilling as any bestseller that have come or will come. I do see my life, whatever part of it has played itself till now, as an amazing journey & I look forward to writing an ending that justifies the journey up till now!      

TO YOU....

                                                                                                                             Sachin Phadkar
                                                                                                                                    XYZ
                                                                                                                                   Nagpur

 Hi,

Hey, do you remember this format of letter writing? We were made to practice this style of writing numerous times in school & this is supposed to be the 'informal letter' style of writing a letter. That is also the reason why I am writing to you in this format, because things had always been informal with us, regardless of how they are at present. I have always told you that I shall carry a certain image of you with me when we depart, and that image will be the reflection of the best times we've had together! So for me, you will always be that girl! :)

So, why am I writing to you? I can see the eyebrows in your mind narrow down, trying to find the whackiest reason there can be to write to you, not to forget my old school style of writing! Well, one, I don't know where you are right now so I couldn't mail this to you, if I could, I would have loved to! The old school charm of a letter never dies, does it? Hence the format. Secondly, I just wanted to speak, speak out rather! I understand that considering our highly differing schedules, we might not converse on the phone & probably we might fall short of things to talk about & there will be awkward pauses in between. Writing has always been our thing (mine more because of you!) and you have never spoken as clearly as through your writing. So I felt it to be the best medium to converse. Frankly, I have thought a lot before I wrote this letter, about many things. First was whether I should write it or not, will you or won't you read it, if you do how would you feel, if you don't, how would I feel. Also what impression would you make of me, what would I want it to be. Too much on the heavy side, isn't it! So finally, I decided to just let go & write regardless of all the mentioned factors. It's good to be like that sometimes.

So, how are you? From the limited amount of what I see, courtesy social networking sites, you seem to be doing great! Your job, your friends, your books, your songs, everything seems to exude the same exuberance as you do! You haven't written in a really long time, so it must be all of these that are keeping you busy I guess. You are in a big city, a happening city. There must be lots that must be happening everyday, isn't it? Seemingly small things which are actually large?! You must have measured more than half the city by now, walking, visiting & exploring different places. You seem to have put on a little bit of weight. The radiant, good health types. But you seem more or less the same. That must have sounded as if I have seen you after ages but really, the truth doesn't seem too far. It feels so long ago that I knew you, that we used to talk. Time seems to have passed like those cloud time lapses they show on TV. My memories of you are becoming like those 'diary' memories which you open up once in a while and just smile at that time you spent, some instances sketched so vividly! So much has happened between then & now. I only smile at your memory though! I carry a bias when it comes to you, to just retain the good, forget the bad. It's simply not worth it, to carry the bad forward. I left it when we left. 

 I am doing great too!! The geographical & cultural transfer has again been significant, like it was when I came from Nagpur & we met. I am back to my hometown, but trust me, it feels like I am back in a whole new city! I treasure it more, I see more possibilities, I see more opportunity! Mine is what they call a 'small city' but let me tell you, there is huge potential & a lot of activity happening here. There is a challenge but I am confident of overcoming it! I have set off on a rather different road than the one that was planned initially. It is surprisingly great! I had never picture myself like this but now that I do, it's awesome! Now this is it & I have to make my vision come true! Do you know Jack Ma? He is the billionaire founder of this e-commerce firm called Alibaba. I am somewhat trying to walk his way. Do some thing different. Google him. It's what most of us dream of & well....stop at that. I am working on that dream! It seems all glossy & cool from far off but it's tough, really tough at times. There's just this anxiety or fear at times, there are moments of uncertainty & not to forget the practical challenges I face. But I can take it all with a smile. The calling is much more alluring than the gravity of the challenges. Apart from that, my social life is heavily compromised, it is nowhere & nothing like yours. Not a sad thing really. It's.....okay,nothing to frown about. :)

Well, I might be going a bit haphazard now or I might start getting so. I'll stop here for now. Do reply in case you read this. Bye!    

    

LOVE LETTER

If I had to confess, if you had to guess

What you mean to me; more or less

Nothing could have explained it better

Than this honest love letter.

                                                                                                                        

Why do I love you firstly you'd ask

Answering that is certainly no  task

There are no bullet points, one & two

I love you coz you are YOU!

Look within yourself & you will know

Why I'd never want to let you go

You are all that Love could mean to me

You represent everything I want to see.

It's been a long wait to find the right one

It's been heartbreaking, but all said & done

The wait has finally shown it's worth

  By the way that you came & bought me mirth.

It was all about the notions other people share

This is how you love, this is how you care

But with you, I know what Love really means

It means just Me & You, nobody in between!